I ran into Him at the library. Yadi, Xoi, and Alli went there to visit Reily, who volunteered there on the weekends. It was strangely crowded, and we went up the stairs marked "authorized personnel only," positioned right at the entrance. Reily was shelving books.

A bit about Reily.

She's abnormally skinny, but she eats food, so I know she's not anorexic. Her mother is the funsucker of all funsuckers, and she rarely is allowed to do things outside of school, besides her volunteering. Reily is the baddest one in our group and swears more than all of us combined.

"You have one major, F---in' problem." She said to me. "Guess who is downstairs, signing autographs?"

"I have a feeling that I'm not going to like this." I said.

"You're right." Reily finished with the books. "It's Him."

Yadi gasped. Allie looked town between hatred and longing. I said some choice words directed at Him.

"OK, I'm going to go kill him." I said calmly. "Somebody get me a knife." When nobody moved, I said, "Alright then, I'll just kill him with my bare hands. It's better this way; it's more personal."

Alright, I have to tell a little bit about Him, because normally, I'm not this violent. He is currently the resident celebrity of Borningsville. Ever since he joined a band in the city about fifty miles away, he's been made famous, if not rich. He was my childhood friend, first love, and former boyfriend. He was also the man who broke my heart.

*nervous giggle* But we're not talking about that, are we now?

"You can't kill him." Yadi said calmly, ever the good little church girl. "You should forgive him and move on."

"I did move on. I swear I did." I replied. "I went as far away as possible from that guy. I have tried to forget Him, but the bastard keeps showing up and talking to me like nothing ever happened. And then I get this feeling, and I just want to carve that little smile off his lips." My hands were in fists so tight that my fingernails dug painfully into my palms.

"From the deepest love springs the greatest hate." Yadi said remorsefully.

"There's a fine line between love and hate." Xoi quoted.

"I'm going to kill him." I repeated, ignoring them. I turned on my heel and marched to the door of the "authorized personnel only" stairs. I threw it open, and saw, too my horror, that He stood just two stairs from the top.

A very long moment passed during which I glared and He smiled.

"Hey Nathi." He used my nickname from our childhood. "Long time no see."

"Get out of my way." I muttered and pushed passed him. I left the library and sat on one of the iron benches, oddly glad that I had seen Him and wishing He was dead.


My friends came out a little while later, and I saw Yadi tucking a signed CD into her purse. I ignored it. "What took you so long?" I asked.

"He was questioning us." Reily said. "Stuff like 'do you girls still capitalize pronouns in reference to me?' and 'have you bought all my CDs' and 'where has Nathi been?'"

"You didn't tell him, did you?" I asked.

"Um..." Allie said. "Maybe."

I felt a strong desire to kick something. "So he knows that I go to Lakewood?" I felt that sick feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach. "Damn him."